Day 80: The Day I've Been Dreading

It's here. The day I've been dreading for a long time now has finally come. Jackson chewed a hole in his last pacifier. On the one hand I'm ecstatic, I've wanted to get rid of those things for ages. But at what cost?! He may never nap again!

Right now you're calculating his age in your head, thinking: A pacifier? At his age? That's certainly what I'd be doing if I were you, anyway. But just like I plan on letting him naturally outgrow his need to nurse, I wanted to let him decide when he was ready to leave the paci behind. And since he's only been using it in his crib for the last year and a half, it hasn't been disruptive to the rest of life - except maybe for those poor front teeth.

Yes, you read that right. He's also still in his crib (he's how old?!), but we're letting him decide when he's ready for that transition as well, especially because it requires a move upstairs to a bigger bedroom farther away from us. Plus, when I talked to him about his friends and their beds, then asked him about his crib, his only response was: "It's the best!" So if he's happy, I'm happy, and when he's ready, I'm ready.

We've talked a lot about the paci recently, and I told him whenever he feels like he's grown up enough to sleep without one, he can tell me. On a few occasions he did, but then quickly changed his mind when the reality of not having it set in.

We also talked a lot about his chewing habit. As he chewed through the stash one by one, I explained that if he didn't stop there wouldn't be a paci left for him to use. But I don't think he really grasped the reality of it.

So when I woke up this morning to find the final paci mutilated in his crib, I died a little inside. Am I doomed to battle through every nap and bedtime for the rest of his life? I've never seen a teenager screaming for a paci, but Jackson's pretty attached to it. All I could think to do was cut off the gnawed-through tip and leave him an unusable piece of silicone to hold in the hope that it would get him through the transition gently.

But alas, an hour into nap time and I have yet to hear silence in his room. What I do hear is lots of jumping, chatting (I really must have a talk with that snuggle puppy who doesn't know when to stop talking), and all manner of silliness. So we haven't hit our worst case scenario yet, but I'm still holding my breath.

This is one of many transitions in our near future, so I'm really trying to embrace change. Sure some difficulty will come along, but so will some excitement! Naps may be pretty rough for a while, and this may be the worst possible timing for that, but we'll get through it. And we can get through it unscathed if I can keep a positive attitude about it. It will pass. No stage, good or bad, lasts forever. And this I will repeat to myself over and over when it takes hours for him to fall asleep!