Day 78: It's Everywhere!

This is what I was frantically shouting as I changed my first poo-filled diaper in months. If it's possible, I lost the art of diaper changes.

Max didn't take me up on the opportunity to go potty this morning as he usually does, which in itself wouldn't have been a problem. But when he woke up from his morning nap and I wasn't able to get to him right away, we took a turn for the worse.

Once my hands were free, Jackson and I headed toward the bedroom where he climbed up onto the bed to do some jumping (has he learned nothing from the five little monkeys?). Ordinarily Max waits for me, so when I opened his diaper with the intention of helping him potty, I was met with quite a surprise.

Before I knew what was happening, legs were flailing, hands were doing the inevitable crotch-grab, and a roll was underway. Then came the, "Oh no! It's everywhere!" The sheets, the pajamas, his arms, feet, legs, and belly; fortunately I got his hands under control before they made it to his teething mouth! Now what to do with the rest of this body that won't stop thrashing?!

I finally grabbed for a handful of wipes that were barely within reach as I tried to keep him from tumbling off the bed or getting his head crushed by his bouncing brother, who by the way was shouting (aka singing) into a funnel because there wasn't enough going on already.

I wish I could say I took it all in stride. But when Jackson asked, "Mommy, how are you feeling?" which he does whenever he can tell I'm having some big feelings, I had to answer, "Frustrated!" I did at least pull the interaction out of the gutter soon enough that, while I was still trying to get Max cleaned up, I was able to answer the next question with a smile: "Mommy, are you happy now?"

It may be natural for me to become frustrated in a sticky situation like this (pun intended), but I don't think it has to be. I'm hoping that our next stealthy ninja poo is a long way off, but also that I'll be ready to respond naturally with acceptance, a smile and a giggle. I don't have to let circumstances, however messy they are, determine how I feel.

For now I'll take one day at a time until eventually that unconditional way of life becomes a reality, not just a theory.