tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181446807575097193.post1991468714784949006..comments2023-03-27T04:25:39.453-07:00Comments on The Positive Parenting Challenge: Day 64: R-E-S-P-E-C-TMeredithhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16332544075938121114noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181446807575097193.post-49038082524969111382011-03-08T05:01:14.505-08:002011-03-08T05:01:14.505-08:00It's so great that you're able to give him...It's so great that you're able to give him a little ownership over his treatment now! Circumstances (big, small, good, bad) always have an effect, but I'm sure there's a heavy personality influence at play with this one too. I think respect comes naturally to some and is more learned for others - perhaps why my son "got it" at an unusually early age. Feeling respected is extremely important to his sensitive little soul, as are other people's feelings (he's literally the only child I know of who never went through a hitting or grabbing phase, for which I take *very* little credit). A child with less of that trait wouldn't tune in so readily. We're about to test this theory out since Max has an opposite personality but will be raised in the same respectful environment. Stay tuned for the results. :) I think we can all at least rest easy in the fact that if we're modeling a respectful relationship and respectful communication (with them and others) they will eventually learn how to reciprocate that - even if it does take a little longer than we'd like.Meredithhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16332544075938121114noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181446807575097193.post-61802245963090704842011-03-07T18:47:32.461-08:002011-03-07T18:47:32.461-08:00Sometimes we struggle with this with our older son...Sometimes we struggle with this with our older son, who is about a year older than your son and probably doesn't speak as well. He had a very involved medical history and, unfortunately, it's really hard to perform medical procedures on a toddler in a respectful manner. I'm glad to say that with the little bit of medical issues that remain, we are able to speak to him respectfully about them, and he takes a more active role. He picked out the color of his hearing aids and is very proud to tell people. He gives himself his own medicine (I draw it up and hand it to him, and he does it). And he knows his way around the doctors' offices. <br /><br />But as I read this, I wonder if his medical history is the reason why we sometimes have trouble, even as we continue to model respectful behavior to each other and to him and his brother. That he felt so disrespected when he was younger that he reverts to resistance whenever he feels the least bit threatened.<br /><br />Hard to say with our younger one, who isn't even two yet. He does the hitting thing and the grabbing thing, and our responses vary depending on the context, but he has learned that when I say "nice" in response to his hitting me, he'll stroke my face affectionately and give hugs.Mollyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13774558034963099447noreply@blogger.com